Overwhelmed, oversensitve, but...me!

by Angela
(Ontario, Canada)

I know I'm supposed to learn something from every human that I encounter but, I just cannot figure out what I'm supposed to learn from the personalities that I always seem to encounter in work situations. I've thought long & hard and the only things I can seem to learn from these harsh types of people is to NEVER *EVER* be anything like them & to also love, appreciate, like, & be GRATEFUL for the person that I am!

Most of the stress I encounter (in a job situation) from being an HSP tends to be from other people. As we're so rare, when I attempt to explain the HSP term to people, I usually get: "Oh, well, *I'm* really sensitive too"! They don't seem to understand. When I do manage to sufficiently explain the nervous system component, they look at me like I've got 3 heads. Why? Because this is NEW information to them! New equals weird & scary to a lot of people.

As a female, I'm blessed with the ability to multi-task. This is what I do at my job & I'm good at it. One thing I've noticed at work (that causes my HSPism to be a curse rather than a gift) is that I simply CANNOT handle having a lot of *information* thrown at me all at once. This causes me issues because I can only listen to one important instruction at a time. I've read in Elaine's book that it is very common for HSP's to get confused when too much information is being tossed their way. Sadly, because I have to ask co-workers to repeat themselves, I'm viewed as dumb. An idiot who can't follow direction because she's "too slow". I've been told by MANY people (teachers, psychologists, etc.) that I'm very bright but, situations like this leave me feeling stupid. I hate having to ask a supervisor to repeat himself because I missed it the first time due to external, overstimulating 'chaos'. I work in an animal hospital & I'm the receptionist. I *LOVE* working with the public & the sweet animals & I far prefer being up at the front desk to being in the back but, with phones ringing, vets talking to you while clients talk to you while I'm billing someone out on the computer is a lot for ANYONE let alone an HSP! I get attitude from one of the vets all the time & I know that's HIS problem but, it affects me WAY too much! I'll hear him say to the clients: "Now, I've given a lot of information to you all at once here. Do you have any questions?" NEVER do *I* get that from him! :(

I also find it difficult & upsetting that at EVERY clinic I've ever worked at, euthanasias are NOT handled in a way that *I* would handle them. I have a big beef with this. That is a VERY delicate time & I feel that the people should be handled with much more care & sensitivity than they usually are at most vet clinics. I understand that, in this area, my standards are high but, I have high standards when it comes to treating people well. In fact, just the other day, I was at work for a staff meeting (new computer program training) & we were all gathered around the computer guy out front when the one vet that I really like, came out of an appointment with a client who had to put down her sick cat on the Monday. She had just learned that she may have to put down her other cat (we think they both ate something bad) & she was sobbing while waiting to be billed out. Every one of my coworkers sat there listening to the computer guy while this poor woman sobbed all alone beside them. I was horrified, got up, took her a box of 'Kleenex', rubbed her back, & spoke quietly to her for a bit before walking her out to her car. *WHY* would NO ONE else think to do something so simple? Something that would take 5 minutes of their time! I was upset & embarrassed. In that moment, I felt ashamed to work with these people & I really LIKE most of them! Anyway, those are just a few examples that I can think of. I find work VERY, VERY challenging as an HSP but, that has a lot to do with one particular vet that I work with. He's a challenge for ALL of us there but, being so sensitive, I just can't deal with him.

Anyway, I know this wasn't written the best (I can usually write much, much better) so, I apologize for that but, I'm pretty sure my points were clear & I hope I'm not the only one of us who has these kinds of difficulties. Thanks! :)